Alok adds: The statistics say there r only 900 girl child born against 1000 male child. So the available marriageable age girls are in shortage then available male. And we know for sure whatever is in shortage has high price tag.
Also if opportunity is given then female student get better scores in education.
They definitely look better then male.
In many jobs like call center, malls, reception, hospitality, hospitals, dentistery, phisiotherepy, dietition etc etc only female are prefferred but many predominant male areas like cabbi, flying etc etc women are able to replace male.
Statsitics say lone men finds it difficult to live specially when sick or old without wife/ mother.where as a widowed women can go on.
So how then things are going against women?? It is our dirty Indian psyche. Bias against women.And most time the women herself are against other women. i will narrate live cases in some other mail.
So make women come out of slave menatality. Make them independant, bold, graceful but dignified. No male should ever take a female for a ride and think they are masters and she is subordinate, she is kamwali. In no marriage women and her side has to bow down. If they are enetering a relationship then it is a eqaul partnership or the contract should be broken and with pride. Remarriage, single lady, etc should become a pride position if a woman is illtreated, insulted, beaten,cheated etc.. No partnership can work if any one partner is arrogant, cheater, crimnal, bias, atrocious,irresponsible. It has to be a joint venture or it must break... sooner the better.
So there is no reason for any female to committ suicide or get depressed. They will be still sought after, get good jobs, can sustain with pride. No one can give you pride and dignity in plate you have to earn and if need be demand. Women of India rise:
EXPERT ADVICE
It's time to get over despair
Women who devalue themselves stuggle to follow the norms of the society
Varkha Chulani
Iwonder how many people would have squirmed reading the news of Nidhi Gupta, a Chartered Accountant by profession, comitting suicide after pushing her two children, Gaurav and Mahika, over the terrace
The very act of taking her children down with her made me realise that this was not only an act where the person believed that life had no future for her, but where she also believed that it would hold no good for her kids. That if she only ended her life it wouldn't be good enough because she assumed that misery and doom for her kids was inevitable. The hopelessness was not only personally experienced; she was equally despairing about the fate of her kids and their future. When a person sees no hope, however transient and momentary that thought is, and when he believes that there are no prospects or potential in times to come, in an impulsive unthinking panic driven moment he does what he does. I think this is exactly what happened to Nidhi.
The question that emerges then is, why do we wait so long and allow ourselves to get into conditions where the only way to end misery is to end life? Many would argue and suggest, what else can women in our country do? Their parents don't want them back, they are economically dependent on their husband or on members of their wedded family, social stigma about separation and divorce still prevail, children come into the equation so how can a mother think of her happiness and needs, since the woman gets her identity and security from her husband what would she be without him, and so on and so forth. Conditioning others would argue. She is taught from birth that she is first a daughter, a sister, a cousin, and a niece. She then 'evolves' into a wife, a daughter-in-law, a sisterin-law, a mother. Nowhere does anyone tell her, that before all of the above, she is a person. An individual. An entity whose personage comes from nothing else other than herself. But she never hears that or if for a fleeting moment begins to think it and somewhere by mistake voices it, she is reminded of her standing. She 'learns' as a way of life, that she is of little significance. She carries these learning's into marriage and 'dumbs down' to get along. Her uniqueness is eroded. She begins to 'fit'. Her personality, her distinctiveness is submerged to give way to the 'new' persona she takes on. After all she is the one who has to make the adjustments and adapt. Isn't that what good girls from good families with good upbringing do? She is constantly reminded that if she steps out of line, her value systems are flawed and that her parents didn't 'educate' her. Education for most is the ability to go with the flow, to not step out of line. Our cultural systems propagate that. Never mind that the same culture propagates sati, the caste system, giving of dowry and that a man's word holds more importance than a woman's. With these 'cultural values' at the back of her mind she sets out to live her life. Or in Nidhi's case, to take it!
Nidhi did what she did because she devalued herself and with that her ability to create a better life for herself and her children. Kowtowing before her 'new', 'well-meaning' family – some of whom she would never associate with or befriend had she not been 'married' to them but had to put up with only due to 'law' – the erosion of her 'self ' would have begun pretty much early on. Sure, not all women undergo the same plight, but this is not about the minority who don't but about a majority who bear silently and swallow uncomplainingly not only 'well-intentioned' unasked for advice but well–intentioned taunts and barbs. The good intention being since we are the boys' side we own you, 'we know better' and 'we'll show you how'. You, the girl, sits back and re-learn what 'good' living is about!
It is not about propagating the feminist movement or about equality for the sexes or about bra-burning freedom, it is about the mental health or the unfortunate lack of it among many a woman of today. Insecurity about self, feeling inadequate and always having to perform to prove that she is able, is driving the Indian woman around the bend. Top that with insensitive, uncaring, un-thoughtful family and you have a recipe for disaster. So she either purges herself by fitting into model like definitions of how she should look, cut herself up when she doesn't get that promotion or she finds her worth by living through her children and bemoans the fact when they leave her nest. Worse still, she kills herself when she believes that no solutions exist. Save yourselves and don't be the next Nidhi! The writer is a clinical psychologist and counselor
GIVE HER RESPECT: Treat a woman like an individual and respect her for the person she is
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