Monday, August 30, 2010

REACTION VS RESPONSE

Once you become comfortable with cockroach then your response changes. So become comfortable with all includes all is even bad people around you. Similarly become comfortable will life with all its mighty good,bad and ugly changes and surprises.

REACTION VS RESPONSE

Suddenly, a cockroach flew from somewhere and sat on a lady. I wondered if this was the cockroaches response to all the glory that was spoken about it!

She started screaming out of fear. With panic stricken face and trembling voice, she started jumping, with both her hands desperately trying to get rid of the cockroach. Her reaction was contagious, as everyone in her group got cranky to what was happening. The lady finally managed to push the cockroach to another lady in the group.

Now, it was the turn of the other lady in the group to continue the drama. The waiter rushed forward to their rescue. In the relay of throwing, the cockroach next fell upon the waiter. The waiter stood firm, composed himself and observed the behaviour of the cockroach on his shirt. When he was confident enough, he grabbed and threw it out with his fingers.

Sipping my coffee and watching the amusement, the antenna of my mind picked up a few thoughts and started wondering, was the cockroach responsible for their histrionic behaviour? If so, then why was the waiter not disturbed? He handled it near to perfection, without any chaos.

It is not the cockroach, but the inability of the ladies to handle the disturbance caused by the cockroach that disturbed the ladies.

I realised even in my case then, it is not the shouting of my father or my boss that disturbs me, but its my inability to handle the disturbances caused by their shouting that disturbs me. Its not the traffic jams on the road that disturbs me, but my inability to handle the disturbance caused by the traffic jam that disturbs me. More than the problem, its my reaction to the problem that hurts me.

The Take-Away : The women reacted, whereas the waiter responded.

We should not react in life, we should always respond. Reactions are always instinctive whereas responses are always intellectual.

Saturday, August 28, 2010

all of marriageable age must read this

http://voiceofwomenindia.blogspot.com/search/label/

Thanks and Regards,
Alok Tholiya (S.E.O.),Marigold Hall,
Tholiya Bhavan,10th Road,Santacruz East,
Mumbai 400055
M:9324225699
My favorite quote: Work hard to get what u like...or else....U ll b forced to like what u get!
My links and blogs : ONLY AUTHENTIC FREE MATRIMONIAL WEBSITE FOR DIGAMBAR JAINS: www.digambarjains.com/
For Issues of Sr. citizens : http://varishthanagrik.blogspot.com/
Issues of Public interests : http://aloktholiya.blogspot.com/
For harassed litigants : http://litigants.ning.com/
•Also subscribe to my very popular yahoo group for mails on ahead of time views: Send blank mail to: menow-subscribe@yahoogroups.com precious collections: http://beautifulwe.blogspot.com/

your spouse is a cheater if .....

Con-artists takes full advantage of poor enforcement of laws in India. They marry women in India and have relations with another women to exploit them and not for a loving marriage. If you believe that your relationship is full of all secrecy due to a bigamous nature, there is no hope that it can ever be a loving marriage to you. That marriage can be for a specific exploitation purpose. If you see symptoms like the following:
1. spouse keeps most of the matters secret from you.
2. spouse lies to you frequently.
3. spouse does not allow you to receive incoming phone calls.
4. spouse doesn't allow you to answer/touch his/her cell phone.
5. spouse doesn't introduce his/her family members and friends to you.
6. marriage is not consummated and spouse is not interested in a physical relationship with you due to guilt
7. spouse keeps expenses charged to joint financial accounts secret.
8. spouse harassing for your income for mortgage and bill payments and threatening you.
9. spouse spreading false allegations against you and claiming him as a victim of mental cruelty.
10.spouse comes home late every night for no believable reason.
11. spouse doesn't walk, talk, dine, sleep, care or share for anything with you.

12. spouse is cold to relationship and does not care for your feelings, health

13. spouse is not giving enough money to run the house,not making the wife joint holder in house, bank other places means the intentions r differant etc etc

These may be classic signs of deception.

There is no reason to work as a slave in that house. Most women may hope that they would have a healthy, normal marriage one day and may keep working hard, cooking, cleaning after working outside of the house for 8-10 hours at their own jobs despite of not getting any love or respect in their marriage. The bigamous nature of a marriage will never change and we must stop the root cause and avoid anyone in that situation. People don't know they are marrying anyone with a pre-existing spouse and ruining their life. So, deceiving person must be punished.

Friday, August 27, 2010

one can ill treat some one to drive him/ her mad but yes good concious person can work for reversal too.........Alok

We have now seen some changes in physical and mental conditions of her. The present condition can be:

Generalized anxiety disorder

Definition

Generalized anxiety disorder (GAD) is a pattern of frequent, constant worry and anxiety over many different activities and events.

Alternative Names

GAD; Anxiety disorder

Causes, Incidence, And Risk Factors

Generalized anxiety disorder (GAD) is a common condition. Stressful life situations or behavior developed through learning may also contribute to GAD.

The disorder may start at any time in life. GAD occurs somewhat more often in women than in men.

Stress

Anxiety disorder can arise in response to life stresses

Environmental factors: Trauma and stressful events, such as abuse, the death of a loved one, divorce, changing jobs or schools, may lead to GAD. GAD also may become worse during periods of stress. The use of and withdrawal from addictive substances, including alcohol, caffeine, and nicotine, can also worsen anxiety.

Post-traumatic stress disorder

Main article: Post-traumatic stress disorder

Post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) is an anxiety disorder which results from a traumatic experience. Post-traumatic stress can result from an extreme situation, such as combat, natural disaster, rape, hostage situations, more serious kinds of child abuse, or even a serious accident. It can also result from long term (chronic) exposure to a severe stressor,^[6] for example soldiers who endure individual battles but cannot cope with continuous combat.( Can she withstand spouse related uncertain life??) Common symptoms include hypervigilance, flashbacks, avoidant behaviors, anxiety, anger and depression.^[5]

Separation anxiety

Main article: Separation anxiety disorder

Separation anxiety disorder (SepAD) is the feeling of excessive and inappropriate levels of anxiety over being separated from a person or place. Separation anxiety itself is a normal part of development in babies or children, and it is only when this feeling is excessive or inappropriate that it can be considered a disorder. Separation anxiety disorder affects roughly 7% of adults and 4% of children, but the childhood cases tend to be more severe, in some instances even a brief separation can produce panic

Anxiety disorders

Content provided by Healthwise

Anxiety disorders are a type of mental illness characterized by severe anxiety that interferes with a person's life. Anxiety is an uncomfortable feeling of fear, uneasiness, or concern that something bad is about to happen.

Anxiety disorders include:

Generalized anxiety disorder, which involves several months of ongoing physical symptoms that occur along with anxiety.
Panic disorders, which involve repeated episodes of sudden fear and feelings of danger or impending doom, along with physical symptoms.
Obsessive-compulsive disorder, which involves frequent, repeated thoughts leading to repeated or persistent behavior (such as excessive hand-washing).
Post-traumatic stress disorder, which involves reliving a traumatic event (such as a war experience or rape) and feelings of numbness and disinterest in daily activities.

These disorders can be treated with medications and/or counseling.

Symptoms of Anxiety

The following are symptoms that can be experienced by those in an anxiety state.

Physical Symptoms

Headaches
Blurred vision
sweating
Chest pains
Physical Fatigue
Pins and Needles
Frequent use of Toilet
Hands ⁄ Body ⁄ Legs shaking
Faintness ⁄ Fainting
Hot Flushes
Choking sensation
Jelly like legs
Agitation

Light Headed
Flushed face
Lump in the throat
Racing ⁄ Thumping heart
Diarrhoea
Hyperventilation
Breathing difficulties
Stomach churning
Neck & overall tension
Sounds amplified
Muscle spasms
Anxiety ⁄ Panic attacks
Blushing

Mental ⁄ Emotional symptoms

Feelings of bewilderment
Going mad
Indecision
Suggestibility
Loss of Confidence
Difficulty concentrating
Disintegration ⁄ Depersonalization (a feeling of falling apart)
Afraid of making a fool of oneself amongst others
Feelings of guilt ⁄ Sorrow ⁄ Disgrace
Short term memory loss
What's the point ⁄ What's the use
The struggle is becoming ⁄ Has become too much
Feeling alone ⁄ Lost within oneself
Perfectionist
Little or no motivation
Fear of the unknown

Feelings of unreality ( such as )

Detached from surroundings
In a maze
Dark tunnel
Deep hole
In a different world
Mentally Detached

Obsessive thoughts
Compulsive actions
Afraid of harming someone
Weird strange thoughts
Thoughts of suicide
Thoughts or songs that wont stop
Overwhelmed by sadness ( eg. News on TV )
Overreacting mentally ⁄ Emotionally ⁄ Verbally
Becoming short tempered
Fear

While this is an extensive list of symptoms please be assured you will only ever experience some of them as I did. Even more so I also want to reassure you that complete recovery from any of these symptoms is possible with the right help.

Furthermore as frightening as they are, these symptoms cannot harm you. They are not serious. I repeat, they are not serious. There is no edge to go over. These feelings will never grow beyond your control.

11 Things to Say to Someone with Depression / Anxiety:

What to say:

1. I'm here for you

2. You're not alone in this.

3. You matter, You are important to me.

4. Love: Do you want a hug?

5. Reassure: We are not on this earth to see through one another, but to see one another through.

6. When all this is over, I'll still be here and so will you.

7. I can understand what you are feeling, I offer my compassion.

8. I'm not going to leave you or abandon you.

9. I love you. (Say this only if you mean it.)

10. We'll get through this together: I'm sorry that you're in so much pain. I am not going to leave you. I am going to take care of myself, so you don't hurt again.

11. I will ensure that We get through this together

What NOT to say:
Stop feeling sorry for yourself. Try not to be so depressed. Haven't you grown tired of all this "me, me, me" stuff yet?

The "person cause" and the affected with AD must see the mental health expert immediately. Or same can cause lot of complications and ruin professional career too as such condition can affect domestic, family, social and professional working. Stitch in time saves nine.

Alok………

__._,

__,_._,___

Tuesday, August 24, 2010

Low testosterone linked to fatigue in men

Sylvia Perez
More: Bio, News Team

August 19, 2010 (CHICAGO) (WLS) --

Mood swings, lack of energy and decreased sex drive are usually associated with women and menopause.

However, men who are going through "the change" can experience symptoms, too.

Low testosterone, or "Low T," may be happening earlier and more often than expected.

As the body ages, hormone variations are normal, but when is it time to take action in men?

Low testosterone is estimated to affect up to 5 million men and can cause a host of mental and physical symptoms.

The uncertainty is whether it is a medical condition needing treatment or something men should learn to live with.

The symptoms in Michael Andruzzi were subtle.

"Lethargic, no energy - zero," said Andruzzi.

Only in his late 30's at the time, the fit and muscular Andruzzi knew something was up.

"To go to the gym was very difficult because just very tired, and just didn't feel like going. No motivation," said Andruzzi.

Not exactly signs of something life threatening, but Andruzzi mentioned the symptoms to his urologist at Northwestern Memorial Hospital.

Blood tests were done, and Andruzzi was shocked to learn he had extremely low levels of testosterone. Low testosterone can affect men of various ages.

Urologist Robert Brannigan of Northwestern Memorial Hospital thinks low testosterone, also known as hypogonadism, is under-diagnosed.

Part of the problem he says is many men with the condition don't recognize the symptoms.

They include low energy or fatigue, weight gain, reduced muscle mass or strength, decreased sex drive and mood swings.

"Depression is actually something that closely parallels or mimics low testosterone," said Brannigan. "So we see many men who have actually been treated clinically with antidepressants when in turn their underlying problem is low testosterone."

In many ways, testosterone is what makes men men, but as the body reaches middle age, levels will slowly drop by an estimated average of 1-2 percent per year.

Many are never really bothered by the change, but others can have problems.

Researchers are still trying to understand the long term health effects of low testosterone.

A rise in cases of low testosterone has some researchers scratching their heads.

"What we found which is interesting is that younger men have a much higher chance of having low testosterone then we thought about before," said Craig Niederberger of the University of Illinois at Chicago.

The reasons remain unclear, and what to do about it is also debatable - to learn to live with it or to take action.

Testosterone replacement therapy comes in many forms including patches, gels, implants and injections.

The marketing of these medications has exploded, but a recent medical journal review says treatment is questionable because it has risks and its efficacy is uncertain.

Brannigan says when taken in the prescribed doses, these treatments are generally safe and effective, but he stresses the therapy is not appropriate for all patients.

"For the patient where it's really interfering with the quality of life, I think sitting down with doc and having a discussion makes a lot of sense," said Brannigan.

Mike Andruzzi says treatment has changed his life. He has been doing testosterone replacement for a couple years now to help bring his levels to a more normal range. He says his energy level is up and so are his spirits.

"It doesn't make me feel better than the average person," said Andruzzi. "It makes me feel like the average person."

Guidelines were just revised on sex hormone treatments. The guidelines recommend against screening the general population.

The guidelines also say doctors should only make a diagnosis of low testosterone in men with consistent symptoms and signs and clear measurements of low levels.

Dr. Robert Brannigan

Academic Office
Northwestern University, Feinberg School of Medicine
Department of Urology
303 East Chicago Avenue, Tarry 16-703
Chicago, IL 60611-3008
(312) 695-6124
Fax (312) 695-7030
r-brannigan@northwestern.edu

Clinic Office
675 North Saint Clair Street, Galter 20-150
Chicago, IL 60611-2927
(312) 695-8146
Fax (312) 695-7030

Dr. Craid Niederberger

Urologist
UIC Medical Center
312-440-5127
www.uillinoismedcenter.org

Sunday, August 22, 2010

Fw: [Asian Heart Inst CSG] GOLDEN RULES Heart and body

----- Forwarded Message ----
From: P. Venkatraman <venkat.kanna@gmail.com>
To: AsianHeartInstCSG@yahoogroups.com
Sent: Mon, 23 August, 2010 8:25:20 AM
Subject: [Asian Heart Inst CSG] GOLDEN RULES FOR F***ing

GOLDEN RULES FOR F***ing

1. F***ing once a week is good for health, but is harmful if done everyday.

2. F***ing gives proper relaxation to mind & body.

3.F***ing refreshes you

4. After F***ing, don't take heavy food. opt for liquids

5. F***ing can even reduce your cholesterol level.

6. F***ing reduces weight for sure...... -

    so "FASTing" is good for health;

Saturday, August 21, 2010

try to keep busy, craetively busy, be surrounded, .....but remove myth abt masterbating....Alok

Do not think too much abt sex, mediatae, listen to good discourses. These should work. If all that fails then very occaassionally you may masterbate.But I repeat any unwanted thoughts including sexual desire can be curtailed by being busy,not letting thought wander being spiritual.......Alok

Only males masturbate

Females masturbate as much as males do. However, they tend to report it less than males due to the social stigma attached to it. Also it has been observed that females tend to reduce or discontinue masturbation once they get into meaningful sexual relationships

Masturbation is unhealthy

Masturbation per se does not cause any health hazards. It is not an unhealthy habit. However, it may be mentally unhealthy if it assumes obsessive proportions and the individual is unable to think of anything else. It may also have physical repercussions if the instrument used to masturbate is dirty or infected.

Only teenagers masturbate

Though the practice usually begins during adolescence, almost all adults practice it at some time or the other in their lives. Masturbation is nothing but a healthy way of releasing sexual energies.

Masturbation doesn't provide sexual satisfaction

Sometimes masturbation is more satisfying than the sex act. This is because, during masturbation, an individual is in control of his own movements and can maximise the pleasure according to his or her needs. During sexual intercourse, the degree of satisfaction may, to some extent, lie with the partner.

Masturbation makes one less sexually responsive

It is a common myth regarding masturbation that the act makes a person less responsive to stimulation by a partner, which is not true. It is healthy and a good way to learn about your body and sexual responsiveness. Masturbation helps men to know their ejaculation point.

Masturbation results from unfulfilling sexual relationships

It's a common myth that people masturbate only if they have an unfulfilling sexual relationship with their partner. This myth has no basis. People also masturbate for self satisfaction, even when they have otherwise fully satisfying sexual relationships.

Masturbation results in low sperm count

The quantity and quality of semen does not have anything to do with masturbation. Ejaculating more through masturbation will not result in low sperm count as the body keeps on producing sperms.

Masturbation results in sexually transmitted diseases

Contrary to this popular myth, masturbation is a safe sexual alternative for people who wish to avoid pregnancy and the dangers of sexually transmitted diseases and infections.

Masturbation causes impotence

Another myth is that teenagers will lose the ability to have children if they masturbate more. This myth has no scientific basis. In fact, teenagers tend to masturbate more often than adults as their hormone levels are at the highest point.

Masturbation leads to homosexuality
Masturbation does not determine a person's sexual orientation. Touching your own body does not mean that you would like to touch others body parts.

Masturbation results from sexual exposure

Masturbation is a part of normal sexual development of a child. So, it has nothing to do with the sexual content shown on television or elsewhere.

Masturbation makes one less sexually responsive

It is a common myth regarding masturbation that the act makes a person less responsive to stimulation by a partner, which is not true. It is healthy and a good way to learn about your body and sexual responsiveness. Masturbation helps men to know their ejaculation point.

Masturbation leads to homosexuality
Masturbation does not determine a person's sexual orientation. Touching your own body does not mean that you would like to touch others body parts.

Thanks and Regards,
Alok Tholiya (S.E.O.),

Friday, August 20, 2010

Fw: Read this Q & A.........Alok

This may happen to many youth as they live in same hsg soc, study to gather , work togather and finally may start liking some one but may not be be able to marry person they like. So follow the link......Alok

http://doctor.ndtv.com/faq/ndtv/fid/0036480/What_should_I_do_for_my_low_mood.html#readcomment

Tuesday, August 17, 2010

Divorce

A divorce can be one of the most damaging and disastrous episode in a woman's life. Besides the emotional trauma of separation there are various other practical day-to-day stresses that a woman may have to deal with. She will have to learn to handle life alone, reorganizing her daily life, dealing with the loss of a relationship and the social pressure to establish a new identity for herself among her friends, colleagues and peers.

All this can take an immense toll on her and can be very stressful.

Divorce and stress

Marriage is one of the most magnificent of all relationships. We all have the need to be loved, to feel secure and have a sense of belonging. When this dream gets shattered by divorce, it can cause untold misery. Divorce can sometimes be the least expected event in your life and can throw you off guard.

The trauma of divorce is not the same with all women. Some women learnto cope well, while for a few others divorce can have catastrophicimplications in their personal, professional and social lives.

Here are some of the most common behavioral changes that you may experience as a divorcee:

feel like crying all the time,
withdrawal from social activities,
fatigue,
substance abuse like alcohol or drugs,
sleeplessness,
depression,
feelings of guilt,
anxiety about the future,
irritability,
fear and
mood swings

If such behavior persists, it is advisable to consult a marriage therapist.

Taking control of your life
Although it is easier said than done, taking charge of your life can help you beat the stress caused by divorce.

You may have to pull yourself together many times, before you master the art of being at peace with yourself.

Sources of stress

Household tasks.

Financial and social security.

Responsibility of raising a child alone.

Separation from the husband.

Lack of proper family life.

Learn to relax: Listen to melodious music, visit a peaceful and serene location or indulge in activities that will keep you preoccupied such as writing or painting. Meditation can also help in relaxing your body and mind.
Stop blaming yourself: Just as they say, "Honking will not make the traffic disappear", blaming yourself time and again will not make the pent up stress in you disappear. You just have to learn to respect another person's right to have different opinions. The blame game will not help.
Entertain yourself: Visit friends and relatives. Play your favorite game or go to the movies. This will keep your mind distracted and lessen your worry time.
Seek help: Do not be afraid or hesitant to talk about your personal problems. Choose your most trusted friend or relative to give vent to your feelings. You can also seek support from a professional counselor or therapist if your feel your negative emotions are affecting your daily life.

Adjusting to divorce

Although individuals are different, most women need two or three years to adjust to the changes separation and divorce bring. Some women may need additional time. However dealing with divorce requires three basic steps:

Accepting the divorce: It is more than difficult to do this, but the sooner you start accepting that your marriage is over, the better it will be for you to forgive, forget and move on in life.
Establishing personal and parental roles: You may have a child to bring up. But besides this, remember that you have personal needs that require fulfillment. Balancing your personal needs and parental needs can help you attain an identity for you as an independent individual and as a single mother.
Looking ahead to the future: Make it a point to move on. You have to leave your past behind because your future is calling you. One relationship may have been over. But most certainly, there can be other

Finally...

Dealing with separation and divorce is not easy. You may be overwhelmed with the situation and may find it very difficult to adjust to the many changes and stress that divorce delivers to your life. But believe in yourself because nothing is actually lost until hope is lost.

What is important is not how you dealt with your past, but what plans you have for the future. So move ahead because despite the uncertainties and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world. So be cheerful because tomorrow will be a better day.

http://www.indianwomenshealth.com/Divorce-191.aspx?gclid=CK__6orKwaMCFcdS6wodbmkccg

Divorce cases- Unshackling of North & South Pole

Watch Tower: Divorce cases- Unshackling of North & South Pole

Category » Editorial Posted On Tuesday, August 17, 2010

According to a recent study by New Delhi based All India Consumer Education Society, based on an analysis of data collected from district courts of Delhi, an average of 100 divorce petitions were filed everyday in 2009. In order to cope up with the increasing number of young couples resorting to divorce in the recent years, six more family courts have been set up in Delhi. As per the data available, for the past four years the divorce rate in Delhi, the capital of India has almost doubled and is projected to be 20,000 cases in the year 2010.
In 2006, Bangalore, the IT hub of India was recorded 1,246 cases of divorce filed in various courts. It has been observed that there has been a sharp increase in divorce cases in the major cities such as Mumbai, Kolkata and Chennai, perhaps due the increase in wealth and declining traditional social values. Agro-based states like Punjab and Haryana also have an increase of 150% of divorce case rate compared to the last decade. Kerala, known to be the most literate state has also experienced an increase of divorce rate by 350% in the last 10 years.
There are various causes of divorce in India. The situation in India is not yet worse compared to the western countries such as the United States, but in past one decade divorce rate increased a lot and fast catching up with the West in many respects. Cities are expanding and live in relationship increased along with love marriages. If you don't live in India then you probably wonders why most of Indian marriages are family arranged. Arranged means Family of bride and groom decide their marriage. It is exactly opposite of love marriage.
Now, what are various causes of divorce in India?. A divorce case happens when a husband and wife decide they can't live together anymore and no longer want to be considered as they are married. They agree to sign legal papers that make them each one single again and allow them to marry another person if they want to.
Although that may sound simple, it's not easy for a husband and wife to decide to end a marriage. Often they spend a long time trying to solve problems before deciding to divorce. But sometimes they just can't fix the problems and decide that a divorce is the best solution. Sometimes both parents want to divorce, and sometimes one wants to and the other one doesn't. When there is a kids in a family then, it's really important for kids to know that just because parents divorce each other, they're not divorcing their kids. Some kids think that if their parents are divorcing, it means their moms and dads will want to leave them, too.
Although it's true that the kid of a divorced couple usually lives with only one parent most of the time, the parent who lives somewhere else is still that kid's mom or dad forever.
The other reason of divorces are, rapid urbanization and awareness of various rights are now accelerating the divorce rate, empowerment of women has initiated the dissolution of marriage in urban areas as financially educated women are now open to the option of ending the relationship rather than to bear life long abuses silently.
The various campaigns on gender equality are now giving rise to ego clashes between the husband and wife, especially if the wife too is earning or the bread earner of the family.

Infidelity
Infidelity has been and will continue to be one of the most common reasons for divorce, be it India or any other country. A marriage is based on trust and the moment either of the partners breaks this trust by indulging in an extra-marital affair, you can be sure that irreparable damage has been done to the relationship. In most cases, the best possible way out for the aggrieved partner seems to be divorce.

Regular disputes with Mother-in-law.
Though it is said that a mother-in-law is like a second mother to a newly married girl, there are a few females who donâ€(tm)t agree with this. They regard their daughter-in-law to be a threat to their position in the family and fail to recognize that after their son gets married; he needs to give time and attention to his wife also. The result is that intentionally or unintentionally, they create problems between husband and wife, which - if it gets out of control, leads to divorce.

Lack of flexibility and adjustments
Due to the newly found financial independence, many females are not ready to adjust with their partners at all. They believe themselves to be equal and, sometimes, even superior to men and are not ready to compromise even the slightest bit. Men have always had an ego and saying sorry doesn't come naturally to them. Earlier, women were ready to change and bend, which is not the case now. The result is divorce, even for settling the slightest of arguments.
Nitin Saxena

Monday, August 16, 2010

smart woman.......This one's among the funniest things I have read...

This one's among the funniest things I have read...

> This one's among the
> funniest things I have
> read...
> --------------------
>
> Older Women Are So
> Reasonable !
>
> AFTER BEING MARRIED FOR 44 YEARS, I
> TOOK A CAREFUL LOOK AT MY WIFE ONE DAY AND SAID, "FORTY-FOUR YEARS AGO WE HAD A CHEAP
> APARTMENT, A CHEAP CAR, SLEPT ON A SOFA BED AND WATCHED A
> 10-INCH BLACK AND WHITE TV, BUT I GOT TO
> SLEEP
> EVERY NIGHT
> WITH A HOT 25-YEAR-OLD GIRL".
>
>
> "NOW I HAVE A £1,500,000.00
> HOME, A £45,000.00 CAR, NICE BIG BED AND PLASMA SCREEN TV,
> BUT I'M SLEEPING WITH A 69-YEAR-OLD WOMAN. IT SEEMS TO
> ME THAT YOU'RE NOT HOLDING UP YOUR SIDE OF
> THINGS."
>
>
> MY WIFE IS A VERY REASONABLE WOMAN. SHE TOLD ME TO GO OUT AND FIND A HOT
> 25-YEAR-OLD GIRL TO SLEEP WITH AND SHE WOULD MAKE SURE THAT
> I WOULD ONCE AGAIN BE LIVING IN A CHEAP APARTMENT, DRIVING A
> CHEAP CAR, SLEEPING ON A SOFA BED AND
> WATCHING
> A 10-INCH
> BLACK AND WHITE TV.
>
>
> AREN'T OLDER WOMEN GREAT? THEY REALLY KNOW HOW TO SOLVE
> YOUR MID-LIFE CRISES.
>

11 Warning Signs of Low Testosterone

11 Warning Signs of Low Testosterone

Guys like to make jokes about testosterone, but testosterone deficiency is no laughing matter. The latest research suggests that guys without enough of the hormone face a higher risk of several serious illnesses, including diabetes, osteoporosis, and cardiovascular disease. A simple blood test can reveal whether a guy has low "T," but there are plenty of other clues that a problem exists, as you'll see

Low Sex Drive

Testosterone is what fuels a man's sex drive. If he's low on "T," he's likely to become less interested in having sex. "Testosterone is what's responsible for 'the grrr factor," says Dr. Abraham Morgentaler, associate clinical professor of medicine at Harvard Medical School and the author of "Testosterone for Life." He says men differ in how frequently they like to have sex. But for men with low testosterone, he says, "It's completely absent."

Erectile Dysfunction

Erections are triggered by the body's release of a tiny molecule called nitric oxide. But testosterone is what's needed to trigger this release, and if there's not enough of it, well, nothing much happens down below. Either erections are impossible, or they're not firm enough for intercourse.

Orgasm Trouble

A Testosterone Deficiency Can Cause Big Medical Problems, Including Diabetes, Osteoporosis and Heart Disease

Low Fluid Level

Three parts of a man's body work together to produce the sperm-containing fluid that's released when he ejaculates: the prostate, the seminal vesicles and the testicles. Each of these parts needs a good supply of testosterone to produce a normal ejulatory volume of 1.5 to 5 cubic centimeters. A man with waning testosterone may notice a sharp decline in his "volume."

Genital Numbness

Guys with low testosterone often complain of feeling numb down below. They may not be completely numb, but a touch of the penis or scrotom fails to elicit that feeling of "electricity" needed to spark sexual encounters - and make sex so pleasurable. Says Dr. Abraham Morgentaler, associate clinical professor of medicine at Harvard Medical School and the author of "Testosterone for Life," touching the area "just feels wrong to them."

Fatigue

It's perfectly normal for a guy to feel tired at the end of a busy day. But gus with low "T" feel completely depleted. These guys complain of being more tired than they think they ought to be. "My tank is empty," is how some guys put it.

Decreased Energy

In addition to feeling severe fatigue, guys with low testosterone often lose their drive and initiative. Guys who used to be up and at 'em all day long are sidelined on the sofa.

Mood Problems

Even if they're not experiencing clinical depression, men with low testosterone often feel down or blue. They feel less optimistic than they used to feel.

Irritability

Low testosterone can cause guys to be grouchy and irritable. Sometimes the problem is more apparent to friends, family members and colleagues - than to the men themselves. "A guy might say he's fine," says Dr. Abraham Morgentaler, associate clinical professor of medicine at Harvard Medical School and the author of "Testosterone for Life," but the people around him know otherwise.

Reduced Muscle Mass

It's not like they become weaklings, but guys with low testosterone often feel that they're not as strong as they once were. Some men actually notice shrinkage in their arm and leg muscles, and in their chest. And if they try to build muscles with weight-lifting, they often find it frustratingly difficult to build muscle mass.

More Body Fat

Low testosterone often results not only in reduced muscle mass, but also in increased body fat. Some guys add weight around the middle. Others develop gynecomastic, a.k.a "man boobs."

Shrinkage

Checked your testicles lately? Low testosterone can cause them to shrink a bit and feel softer than normal.

The Good News

The good news about low testosterone is that it's easily treated - commonly with testosterone skin gels or under-the-skin pellets that release testosterone slowly. And in addition to helping resolve problems with sexuality, mood and appearance, testosterone therapy can help protect guys against several serious medical problems, including diabetes, osteoporosis, and cardiovascular disease.

Alok Tholiya

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Friday, August 13, 2010

recently my close friends wife 29 yrs Prachi Ajmera , 4 month pregenant had heart attack, under went engioplasty, god knows the reason.....Alok

Insecure relationships bad for heart

Health Psychology,
July 2010

People who feel insecure in their relationships have a higher risk of developing heart disease and other health problems.

Attachment insecurity has been hypothesised to be a risk factor for disease development and chronic illness. To investigate the association between attachment rating and overall health of adults, researchers studied 5,645 adults, aged between 18 and 60 years, who completed a questionnaire about their attachment and relationships. The participants also provided details regarding their history of 15 health conditions.

An association was found between avoidant attachment - people who feel unable to get close to others or have others depend on them - and chronic pain, such as frequent or severe headaches. People who were insecure in their relationships had further risks. Anxious attachment - a tendency to worry about rejection in relationships, feel overly needy and find that others are reluctant to get close - was associated with a wide range of health problems, including heart-related diseases, such as stroke, heart attack and high blood pressure. Anxious attachment was also linked to a higher risk of chronic pain and ulcers.

These findings suggest that insecure attachment is a risk factor for a wide range of health problems, particularly heart disease.

(Saturday, August 07, 2010)

Thanks and Regards,
Alok Tholiya (S.E.O.),

Monday, August 9, 2010

some keep suffering and make others suffer.....Rahul attempts to improvise the situation .....All the best R Mahajan.....Alok

Rahul Mahajan approaches Psychiatrist and Psychologist:

There is no guarantee that all chronic ailment can be cured with 100% guarantee inspite of easy availability of all types of diagnostic equipments and well researched medicines. Similarly there is no guarantee that Rahul Mahajan or his wife's problem will certainly be over with this bold approach of approaching a Psychiatrist Dr Patkar and Psychologist his wife Varsha. And still bolder approach of announcing to newspaper as there is a huge stigma in society attached to approaching any mental health experts and even greater stigma attached to approaching any sexologists.

When there r crises in life say marital then what are the options:

1. Keep suffering silently

2. Take to addictions or escapism

3. Take to fight and head for divorce ( and ruin the life of family members of both side) ( ruin resources on litigations, detectives, get bad name in office and ruin career, loose peace of mind etc etc)

4. Seek help from spouse / family member/ friend ( great but one they r not likely to improve situation as they are not trained to handle problematic minds) ( ghar ki murgi dal barabar so one tends to not to take even very good advise of family member with pinch of salt and thus will not help) ( family member will himself / herself become affected due to part of emotional turmoil / sometimes even take sides/ sometime where they have to be strict and blunt but can not do so as they have to save their future relations ).

5. Take help of spiritual leaders. That is excellent but both warring faction may not be having same faith on one Guru/ Sadhu/ Muni/ yogi etc.. Then there r more dhongi Sadhus (bogus spiritual leaders who exploit then help) so one has to be very cautious in selecting a GURU/ spiritual leader.

6. Take help of Psychologists/ counselor/ relationship expert. Check they are genuinely qualified, are senior (fresher will do for children/ office stress but not for marital discord etc) , are attached to a reputed institution . Atleast I would avoid any stand alone professional as they don't have knowledge exchange opportunity, knowledge expanding opportunity which one has while working with a large hospital. I prefer docs who attend conferences and lectures on latest development in their field. I prefer professionals who are regularly updating themselves on net, going on training to foreign countries with regular intervals, are active member of their professional councils/ associations etc..

But it is important to note that:

A. Unless you trust and fully accept the counseling it will never work. If one is dragged to a mental health professional then same will never work. Then only thing which can work is chemical / drug given by psychiatrists.

B. Family/ people around have to to be supportive and if needed they too have to be counseled.

C. No one should demean the benefits of spiritual leader / mental heath professional. Faith and following instructions faithfully are the main thing.

D. Many a times it is myths & misconception on sexual issues/ hidden physical relationship problems which are the underlying reasons of discord? In such a case find a good sexologist/ Urologist/ Andrologist, Gynecologists, Endocrinologist etc.

And in our country that is a big task to know in which case whom to approach and and where to approach.

Here health ministry, media, association of sexologists likes CSEPI, Family Planning Association of India (FPAI), and Indian Medical Association should take a lead. Even all hospitals should start special OPD of SEXOLOGY (which should include all above said fields covered.

If I had the money I would have started a Hospital to provide under one roof all departments which help improve marital relationship : Psychology, Sexology, spiritualism, and security to help millions. But god gives money to those who build own houses for 1600 Cr and not do substantial for humanity. But I find happiness and satisfaction in mere writing on these issues as I know I am born in kaliyug which is meant for mean and menace in society.

Publication: The Times Of India Mumbai; Date:2010 Aug 08; Section:Times City; Page Number 2