My Husband Has Gained Weight!

Ask Dr. Laura Berman
http://www.everydayhealth.com/sexual-health/better-sex/specialist/berman/my-husband-has-gained-weight.aspx?xid=nl_EverydayHealthSexualHealth_20130504

Q: My husband has been putting on weight lately, and I am finding it hard to have sex with him. He knows something is wrong because usually I want sex all the time. How do I get over these negative feelings about his weight, or tell him without hurting his feelings? How do I get back into the mood?

— Anonymous

A: 

Physical attraction is an important part of romantic relationships. The fact that you don't find your spouse's weight gain appealing is not necessarily shallow — we need to be attracted to our mates, both physically and emotionally. So it's probably time to clue your spouse in to your needs. This doesn't mean you have to come right out and say "Honey, you need to lose weight!" Try to be a little more subtle! For instance, tell him you want to lead a healthier lifestyle and start cooking nutritious, lean dinners for both of you. Pack him a healthy lunch to take to work so he doesn't eat fast food or vending machine fare. Ask him to join you for walks around the neighborhood or for bike rides in the park. Don't buy junk food (like chips, candy, and soda); replace it with healthy snacks like almonds and fruit.

If he resists improving his health and appearance, you might need to sit down with him and talk about how you feel. Tell him you love him regardless of his looks but that you still need the romance and attraction that is the cornerstone of all good relationships. Finally, try having sex with him more often — it is a good cardio exercise (for both of you!), and the happier you make him in the bedroom, the less happiness he will need to seek in the kitchen!