Sex After Prostate Surgery And New Techniques To Improve It‏

• [CSEPI] Sex After Prostate Surgery And New Techniques To Improve It‏

22-08-2011

 Dr A Jhawar Sexologist

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Sex After Prostate Surgery And New Techniques To Improve It

Dr. David Samadi, Vice Chairman, Department of Urology, and Chief of Robotics and Minimally Invasive Surgery at The Mount Sinai Medical Center knows the wide range of emotions and fears that men with prostate cancer face. As a robotic prostatectomy and prostate cancer treatment expert, Dr. Samadi cares for the total patient, helping them deal with all aspects of treatment, recovery and cure. Robotic prostatectomy procedures, performed to remove the prostate gland and all surrounding cancer, can provide very good cancer cure results, though many men fear the potential side effects of the surgery. Top on their list of concerns: will they be able to have and enjoy sex after prostate cancer treatment?

Dr. Samadi understands this concern. "For most men, sexual function is every bit as important as eliminating prostate cancer. But many of their fears about sex after surgery are carry-overs from what they know of older open and laparoscopic prostatectomy techniques. Thanks to robotic surgery, these fears can be greatly reduced." Historically, the prostate gland was removed through invasive abdominal surgery during which surgeons had a very difficult time sparing the tiny nerve bundles responsible for erectile and sexual function. Often, a man's ability to have sex after surgery was negatively impacted. Today, with the advent of robotic surgery techniques, experienced surgeons like Dr. Samadi have an enhanced view of the prostate gland, allowing increased precision and dexterity. As a result, the risk of damage to the nerves vital to sexual function is significantly diminished.

When treating his prostate cancer patients, Dr. Samadi employs a start-to-finish approach, including an individualized evaluation of sexual function prior to surgery and on-going, post-surgical assessments of options to aid in the return of sexual function. "I consider robotic surgery successful when the cancer is cured and the patient has full continence and potency. All three criteria must be met for me to consider the surgery a success." Dr. Samadi dubs this whole-patient approach, "The Treatment Trifecta."

Dr. Samadi customizes robotic surgery with his own SMART (Samadi Modified Advanced Robotic Technique) method. Using the da Vinci Surgical System, the commonly recommended treatment for localized prostate cancer, Dr. Samadi is able to perform highly precise movements at the surgical site: cancerous tissue is cleanly removed and critical nerves are spared. By not opening the surrounding fascia around the prostate and not suturing the dorsal vein complex, Dr. Samadi has improved the quality of men's post operative sex life. Ultimately, this leads to faster recovery and an improved outlook for regaining sexual function and urinary continence.

"Men want to know they can return to a normal life when this is all over. They want the cancer gone and they want to move on and enjoy sex the way they always have," says Dr. Samadi. While the resumption of sexual potency can take up to 12 months or more, Dr. Samadi assures patients that this is within the normal course of recovery. His comprehensive approach to prostate cancer treatment and sexual wellbeing continues beyond surgery. "It's not uncommon for men to experience some ED immediately following prostatectomy procedures, but this is not an indication of their long-term sexual potency. I continue to work with patients to achieve the complete results they desire."

Source: Smart Surgery

Dr. Anand Jhawar
M.B.,B.S.,D.C.H. (Bombay)
CONSULTING SEXOLOGIST
Fellow : Council of Sex Education & Parenthood International (CSEPI)
Life Member : Indian Association of Sex Educators, Counsellors & Therapists (IASECT)
Life Member : Indian Andropause Society
Honorary Consultant : Family Planning Association of India (FPAI) - Mumbai Branch
JHAWAR HOSPITAL,
F-6, B-2, RAINBOW APARTMENTS
SECTOR- 10,
VASHI,
NAVI MUMBAI - 400703.
MOBILE : 9969132682
E-MAIL : dr_ajhawar@hotmail.com

My reply to imptent husband.......Alok

sanjeev001 executive [ Scorecard : 52] Thank the Contributor Send PM	Dear sir,                  can anyone pls guide me on this topic. i am mentally harrassed by my wife, and wish to seek divorce in any possible way, ours is a 4 month old marriage. we have not yet had any physical relationship due to daily quarrels. hence i am ready to accept anything for seeking a divorce. hence if the girl claims that i am impotent and that is why i am not keeping physical relationship with her, then can it be a ground for a divorce. as i am willing to accept this accusation, as i want to end this relationship in any manner possible. please help Share

22 August 2011, 22:18
niranjan civil practice [ Scorecard : 3648] Thank the Contributor Send PM	Yes.

23 August 2011, 06:33

Alok Tholiya self employed [edit] [edit photo] [ Scorecard : 142]

If u r impotent then u and ur family knew it before marriage. And yet u have ruined her life. A simple remedy of divorce is not the way out. U must openly admit the cheeating to her and apologise or a action on similar ground must follow from her. But 90% cases of impotency r cureable. U have to see best available Urologists, s*xologist ( well qualified MD / MS and above. Have u done that?? U can easily search for them on net. Other easy sources are visit KEM hospital, visit Dr Rupin Shah ,Santacruz West or any large hospital Urology or Andrology dept. If u want further free guidance then write back.

communications, plans, goals have to be clear to ur team..

Many business owners have this complaint that their employees waste a lot of time and they are not able to get 100% out of their people. They say "Somehow, they don't have the vision as big as my vision. They are completely clueless about their work and I have to guide them about each and every thing. How to get them fully involved?"

A small story from daily life, but very much relevant, illustrates the solution of this business problem clearly....

Kalindi was a manager with a company. She was visited by one of her old friends, Shama at her home. Both friends were chatting up and the topic was Kalindi's work team. She was leading a team of five executives and was somehow finding it difficult to get things done through them. "They just don't understand the bigger picture. They waste a lot of time. They disappoint me everyday. Because of their inefficiency, I miss many of my deadlines and I can't achieve my departmental goals. It is so frustrating...! How can I get them involved 100%?" This was her concern.

Kalindi had a visiting cook and a full-time maid servant at home. During the above talk, Kalindi inquired with her cook to ask her about the stock of vegetables at home. The cook checked the fridge and told her what was there. Kalindi sent her back and called for the maid. She instructed the maid  "Please to go to the market and bring Shimla Mirch, Tomatoes, Mushrooms and Pizza bases.". The maid bought the things and gave it to the cook. The cook understood that she had to prepare Pizza, but found that there was no cheese at home. She went to Kalindi to inform this. Kalindi got angry, "Why you did not tell me earlier?". The cook also got upset, as she never knew about Pizza plan. Then Kalindi sent the maid again to the market buy cheese. The maid also grumbled because she had to go all over again to the market.

Shama understood the entire problem, both at Kalindi's office and also at home. She told Kalindi "Did your cook know you wanted to make Pizza? Then how can you expect her to give you specific requirements? Similarly, do your team members know what your goals are? If they do not, and you keep assigning them daily tasks and when they don't find you to guide them, they just wait and waste time. No wonder, you miss deadlines and all are frustrated in the end." Kalindi got the solution to her problem.

Ask yourself. Do your employees know what are your goals? What is your vision? If not, you may have to make pizza without cheese, which won't be very appetizing...!

Tell your people what you all are trying to do. Simple, but very practical. Implement it.

" I want to die": .....NEED YOUR GUIDANCE......

Respected Harishji,

Namasker. 

I m just not competent enough to advise / comment.But can share some of my experiences.

1. A girl was just not willing to  go to school on Thursdays. Other days she was too willing. Luckily we cud narrow down on Thursday and approached school if there is something differant then usual. Teachers said that on Thursdays there is a music class and only two girls have taken that. We had no hesitation in saying that there is some thing wrong happening in that music class as otherwise this girl was too keen on music too. Finally after investigations it was found that the music teacher was trying something un writable here.School removed that teacher and the girl secured first class thru out and further became very good dance and music artist.

2. There was a boy who was very much against going to school while was very interested in learning at home. First thing I tried to find was how was the school he was going to. He was going to one sherry's academy. People in neighborhood said  one advocate started it to keep his wife occupied but she is not taking interest. And finally she has kept two girls from near by slums who r very crude and harsh. He was shifted to Basent Montessari and then Arya Vidya Mandir and did well and even if he was running fever he wanted not to miss his school.

3. one day as I was going that way I wanted to drop my child to school on way. He refused. Child  insisted in going to school in bus. Later on one day I queried child without creating any reservations and child said innocently Khan uncle ( bus owner and driver) puts on filmi songs in bus, he takes us some time to garden etc etc. I had to approach school on this and Principal was aghast to hear that children being taken to garden unauthorizedly. The necessary steps were taken.

4. My son did not want to go on a picnic at any cost.He was refusing to go with full force. School was unable to understand and normally they make it compulsory so were bent upon taking him. I can't pressurize anyone without trying to understand him / her and without preparing him/ her for worst possible/ educating. So when he finally confided that there is a robust Punjabi boy doing all sorts of harassment, pushing, snatching away his food etc etc.. I had to prepare him that world is full of such people and u have to learn to avoid them and at times challenge them. Then when I went to drop him at railway station I specifically asked amongst boys who is this xyz boy and when he was pin pointed I just shook hands with him but he realized there is some reason he was selected for intro. Then I quietly briefed the teacher abt this boy and the reason why my son was reluctant to go to picnic. Since that day there was never a problem. 
So I feel most children have differant issues then elders. So we have to ensure that they confide with us. May be girl has some one in house, neighborhood,school, school bus, servant, uncle, etc etc.. who is doing some thing unbearable to her. May be parents r doing something which she hats too much and finds unbearable. And now in new environment things have changed for better and she is happy.

So if there is reason to believe the parents then definitely she is in better hands and thus feels cool. But if the parents are lying or are ignorant then ....????  But sir, I appreciate your concern for this little girl inspite of being so busy u r thinking of her. Actually even I feel concerned abt her but the limitations r limitations. However request her parents to bring her to u once when she is here on festival holidays and keep one session with her and clear doubt.

Thanks and Regards,
Alok Tholiya

---

To: member_cai@yahoogroups.com
From: nabonita@gmail.com
Date: Thu, 11 Aug 2011 12:35:48 +0530
Subject: Re: [member_cai] " I want to die": .....NEED YOUR GUIDANCE......

 

dear sir...i think you have done what you and your team could do wit
regard to the child...maybe she is really happy after your
intervention,maybe her parents dont want you to interfere more or
maybe its something else...the point is that our job as therapists is
to empower our clients and not make them dependant..the child is young
but her parents also need to be responsible for her wellbeing more
than anybody else...i am sure the child will come back to you when
needs to as your team must have given her the relief...but i dont
think contacting her school is ideal as it breaches confidentiality
completely...i have seen a lot of suicidal clients myself and as long
as the primary caregivers know and are aware of her tendencies i think
it works...we do our best as therapists but we to also have
limitations.

On 8/7/11, Harish Shetty <harish139@yahoo.com> wrote:
> " I want to die": .....NEED YOUR GUIDANCE......URGENTLY
>
>
> " I want to die" shared this 13 year old girl a couple of months ago. The
> thoughts have been disturbing her since a few months. She had crying spells
> , problems in sleeping , poor concentration and fall in grades since then.
> Her medical parameters were normal. Her suicidal thoughts were  mild to
> moderate and  apparently her parents are reasonably conservative and would
> not allow her to meet her friends late in the night. Her family had two
> close biological members who suffered depressive bouts.The family had been
> fairly democratic and indulgent in other ways and parenting philosophies
> were very grounded. Her school was cool without any triggers or hassles for
> this bout of depression.She is impulsive, stubborn but reasonably adjusted.
>
> Some months back the family had taken a decision to send this child to a
> boarding school with the consent and desire of the child. Her close friend
> in her class had also decided the same. This bout of depression upset the
> cart. She was put on antidepressants by me and therapy through a clinical
> psychologist. We felt that the child would be safer here with her parents
> and treatment. The psychologist also had a joint meeting with the present
> principal of her school with the child and the kid relented to stay back.
> She attended her present school for a few days only. Suddenly she began
> insisting that she wants to join the boarding school. All requests and
> counseling was in vain. Her mother agreed with us but her father was
> inclined to go by the girls decision. The decision about the boarding school
> was driven by the child before the onset of depression.
>
> Without our consent her father dropped her to the hostel school. They shared
> the fact with the warden+ the new principal that the child was on
> medications and this was continued. They did not share the fact that the
> child had expressed suicidal thoughts.
>
> We are very worried.
>
> Today after 5 weeks I  spoke to the mother on my own initiative. According
> to the mother the child is reasonably cheerful and has not complained about
> any sadness or pain. I was relieved but many questions cross my mind.
>
> Here we have a child diagnosed to be depressed and suicidal living in a
> hostel without counseling support. At the same time she according to the
> mother is cheerful and has no complaints.
>
> What do you think we should do and how do we proceed ?
>
> anxiously,
>
> Harish Shetty

__._,_.___

Adultery tests .......TOI 30/07/2011

Infidelity tests now a common affair 

Neha Bhayana | TOI-CREST EDITION 


One morning last month,Dubai resident Raj Kanodia fished out a used bedsheet from the laundry basket while his wife was away.He then swiped his mouth with a cotton bud to collect saliva,sealed it in an envelope,and couriered it to a Hyderabad laboratory along with the used bed linen.
A week later,the 34-yearold got his answer.As I suspected,the stain on the bedsheet was indeed semen.And the DNA did not match mine, he says.Kanodia,who has been married for two years,was hurt but is still glad he ordered the test.If I hadnt,I would have been nagged by doubt, says the former Delhi resident,adding that he confronted his wife and they are still trying to work things out.
The test was life-altering for Kanodia,but at the laboratoryOne Touch Solutions and Services (OTS)it was a routine infidelity test.The lab gets at least two to three such requests a month,mostly from young,married men.
Though the infidelity test,which is popular abroad,is relatively new to India,demand for it has been increasing,says Ritu Sohaney,a DNA test consultant at OTS.
The lab gets used condoms,cigarette butts,underwear,waxing strips,tongue cleaners,earbuds,nails and blood-stained bedsheets for testing,she adds.
The Indian Biosciences Laboratory in Gurgaon also receives four to five enquiries every month from young people who want to know how they can nail their cheating spouses.The company charges Rs 27,920 to test one suspicious object.

Very very good article by Mellissaji ... relationship Bombay Times..28 July 2011

Learned a lot about practical outlook about keeping or dumping relationship, and what is not important in relationship. Read carefully point no.8 and get true meaning. Persons as described in point 8 are very clear. Such persons can not be cured even by top of the line doctors,psychiatrists,counselors,they dont believe,they dont believe in morality and if any lay person thinks he/ she can change such a person then not even god can save him or her....Alok

Love between the lines 

10 false notions that romantic novels encourage 

1 Every relationship ends with a happily ever after: 

While a romance novel may end on a happy note,life is a different story with ups and downs that you have to deal with.

2 All romantic heroes are tall,dark and handsome: 

This myth is slowly changing even in romance novels but it still exists at the back of our minds.All romantic heroines are beautiful,proportionate,curvy with a beautiful complexion.Romance is not only about the physical attributes.It's more about connecting with the person and sharing a comfort level.Keep in mind that no one is perfect.

3 Grand expensive gestures are the best way to express love: 

Learn to pay attention to the little things.You dont always need expensive declarations of love to know that someone cares for you.

4 Condoms are barriers between you and your loved one: 

Love making scenes in romance novels are not always a reflection of reality,and while the protagonist of a romance novel can afford to risk things,can you 

5 Relationships are easy and things automatically fall into place: 

You have to work on your relationship,no matter how perfect things may seem.

6 You will always find happiness with Mr Money Bags: 

Financial security is not a guarantee of everlasting happiness.It can make things easy for you but is not the only basis for a good relationship.

7 Forcing you to do something you are not comfortable with in the bedroom is a hint of uncontrolled passion: 

When an individual says no,we should respect that and no matter how passionate you feel you cant force yourself on someone.

8 Drug addicts,abusers,alcoholics,skirt chasers can all be reformed with love: 

While people change its important to be realistic because relationships are hard.Taking on the responsibility of an addict or an alcoholic demands a lot from you as a person.So,ask yourself are you secure enough to deal with the situations that you may encounter.

9 Candlelight dinners,flowers,expensive gifts and trips are the only way to romance your loved one: 

Love is not about extravagant gifts or candelight dinners.Its about caring for each other and being there always.

10 Follow your heart no matter what,even when things sound stupid and absurd: 

Have a balance when it comes to making decisions.Listen to your heart and mind,so that you strike a balance between logic and emotions.
melissa.dcosta@timesgroup.com

Misconception or suppressed facts?????

A new reply has been added to "Re:Misconception about Impotency(about its size)" thread at Lawyersclubindia.com

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There is per se nothing wrong with topic, issues raised, language used. Rather name/word like penis is simply not used in its true spelling is a cheap mentality. We r  not here a cheap, criminal , sick psyche people to get some wrong message from a simple word describing our body organ.

However the facts narrated r not right and are presented in confused way.

There r broadly two types of erctile dysfunctions A. Psychogenic  B. Organic/ Physiological

A competent health and s*x expert can identify the reason and try to cure psychological reason thru psychiatirst and if treated erection can be restored.

In case of physiological disorder:

1. Penis r of differt sizes. But penis of the size smaller then abt 5 cm when erect r not satisfying to partner and not considered as good enough for s*x.

2. Penis if can not last erect for more then reasonable strokes and seconds always then is not fit for intercourse. However at some time or other all men have sustaining desired enough but if that is a permanent case then not fit case for partnering.

3. If any male is never able to penetrate then also he is considered unfit. 

4. Hormonal defeciency but which is easily treateable.

However like any other defeciency most s*xual defecienies are treatable and with scientific eduactions many get get cured. Viagra has helped millions of suffering male. If wife agrees then many suffering men can under go  surgery for artificial erection and same can give good results.

But but if there is  total failure to have satisfying physical relationship then

a) If  person and his family was aware of such untreatable defeciency then they should be punished.

b) If they come to know after marriage and r not able to cure the defeciency then man should gracefully give option to wife to seek divorce by consent.

c) If male denies right of wife to enjoy and vice a versa is true then too they r left with no choice but to seek divorce where a detailed report from competent doctor is asked and then only judgement is given. I dont think any one can get divorce easily on this ground by making false allegation. And then higher court and medical report from super specialists are available.

Hope this will satisfy the conflicts in mind and which erupt because we dont have s*x eduaction in India not even for MBBS / other higher medical courses.

Alok Tholiya

read : menow@yahoogroups.com and   http://menwomenrelationship.blogspot.com/

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